Achieve together marks Neurodiversity Celebration Week 

Beyond the stereotypes: living and learning with ADHD 

“For me, being neurodivergent means my brain meets the world a little differently. Sometimes that means intense focus, curiosity, and creativity, other times it means things that look simple on the outside can take a lot more effort internally. For a long time, I didn’t have language for that, I just knew I often felt out of step with what people expected. Now I understand that my brain isn’t broken or failing, it’s just wired differently. Learning that has changed the way I see myself.”

Challenging misconception 

“A big misconception is that people assume behaviour equals character. Throughout my life, people have assumed I was lazy, rude, slow, stupid, or just not interested, when in reality, I was often overwhelmed, exhausted, or struggling to focus, in ways that were invisible to other people. Another misconception is that ADHD is just something “naughty children” have. When I first asked a GP about ADHD over twenty years ago, that was exactly what I was told and the conversation ended there. Looking back, it’s frustrating how easily something important can be dismissed when people don’t understand it. In the future, I would love for younger people to grow up with language and support that many of us didn’t have. No one should spend years believing they’re lazy, broken, or not trying hard enough when the reality is simply that their brain works differently. Understanding earlier could save a lot of confusion and pain.”

My diagnosis journey 

“My journey to diagnosis involved a lot of years of trying to make sense of things that didn’t quite fit together. When I first asked about ADHD more than twenty years ago, the GP told me it was just something naughty children had and that answer shut the door for a long time. It may take more years of reflection, learning, and connecting experiences before the picture starts to make sense. For years I thought the problem was simply that I wasn’t trying hard enough. Over time I started to notice patterns, the way rejection could hit incredibly hard, the way emotions could swing quickly and intensely, the way sleep could suddenly intrude in the middle of the day like someone had pulled a plug on my energy. Learning about things like rejection sensitive dysphoria, emotional dysregulation, and intrusive sleep issues helped me connect dots that had been scattered across my life. What once felt like personal failure started to look more like a set of challenges I had never been given the tools to understand. When I was diagnosed, there was relief in finally having language for things I had struggled with for years. There was also reflection, thinking about how different things might have been if someone had recognised it earlier. Mostly, it helped me learn to treat myself with more patience.”

The rough with the smooth 

“My ADHD shows up in my focus, my energy levels, and my emotional responses. Some days, I can get deeply absorbed in something and lose track of time completely, other days tasks that should be simple feel like climbing a hill with a backpack full of bricks. Rejection sensitive dysphoria and emotional dysregulation can make criticism or conflict feel very intense, intrusive sleep issues can make exhaustion appear suddenly and without warning. Those things can feed into each other and create difficult cycles where stress affects mental health, which then makes focus and energy even harder. Understanding that cycle has helped me start breaking it. One of my strengths is curiosity. When something captures my attention, I tend to dive into it deeply. It also gives me a creative way of looking at the world, I often connect ideas that seem unrelated at first—that kind of thinking can lead to unusual solutions or unexpected creativity. I think it’s also made me more empathetic toward people who feel misunderstood or overlooked.” 

Simple changes, big impact 

“Clarity and patience go a long way. Clear expectations help reduce a lot of unnecessary stress and being able to ask questions without feeling judged makes a big difference. More than anything, it helps when people choose curiosity over assumption, when they ask instead of deciding who you are based on what they see in one moment. To me, an inclusive workplace is one where people don’t feel like they have to hide how their brain works. It’s a place where differences in communication, focus, or working styles are understood rather than treated as problems. Inclusion isn’t about lowering standards; it’s about recognising that people reach those standards in different ways. I’d love to see more awareness and less stigma in workplaces. A lot of neurodivergent people spend huge amounts of energy masking, trying to appear “normal” so they won’t be misunderstood. If workplaces normalised conversations about neurodivergence and made accommodations easier to discuss, many people would be able to do their best work instead of spending energy just trying to survive the day”.

Moments of connection 

“The moments that stand out for me are the ones where someone listens without dismissing what you’re saying. When someone understands that what might look like laziness or disinterest on the outside is actually someone struggling internally, it changes the conversation completely. One example is when my best friend got diagnosed with ADHD—our friendship and bond has grown immensely since then, because being seen and truly understood in that way matters more than people realise.” 

At:BU 

Sharing stories and experiences like Alan’s is spearheaded by our  Equality, Diversity & Inclusion Group, At:Bu, who lead the way in promoting awareness and driving meaningful change. 

At Achieve together, inclusion isn’t just a value – it’s a priority. We’re committed to creating an environment where everyone feels respected, represented, and empowered. By embracing diversity and reflecting the communities we support, we strengthen our ability to deliver truly person-centred support.